By Bunmi Sofola
ONE of the biggest mistakes you can make is to put your friend up in your flat on a temporary basis, especially when your place is a bit crammed.” Bilikis was desperate for a place to stay and Ann, her childhood friend put her up. But now Ann’s ‘guest’ had been with her for nine months—instead of the three months she said she would spend.
Her boyfriend of a couple of years had not only found someone else—he was getting married and Bilikis had to go. She was very weepy and desperate to find a place, that Ann grudgingly agreed to put her up long enough for her to find a decent place of her own.
“I never guessed hunting for a flat could be such a nightmare,” confessed Bilikis. “Every prospective place the agent showed me was either too expensive or too pokey. It was really depressing—where could I get the money to pay for two years’ rent plus the agent’s charges on my salary?” After four months however, Ann’s patience was wearing thin. Whenever
friends visited, Bilikis was in the living room—watching telly. She didn’t have the decency to respect Ann’s privacy by leaving the parlour that in the end Ann had to ask her to go to her room if she wanted to watch the box especially when friends had one interesting topic or the other to discuss. Bilikis would leave in a huff but she had little say on the freedom she was allowed—the house was not hers to do as she pleased with.
Ann was on the verge of physically throwing her out when Bilikis came to see me in the office a few months back. She’d found a one-bedroom flat in a choice place in town, and had moved in, she gushed. When she mentioned the rent, my jaw dropped. I was instantly on my guard. If she was here to touch me for a loan, I would have a good excuse ready for her. Only she wasn’t. All she wanted were some household odds and ends I didn’t want that she could use at her new place. “So you’ve paid the rent then?” I wanted to know, “sort of” she said. What did she actually mean?
“The place I’m moving into is a brand new house and the boys’ quarters is the one-bedroom flat. When the agent showed me the place and how much it would cost, I shook my head sadly. As luck would have it, the landlord came on an inspection. The agent told him what I wanted; then I realised I’d met him once at a friend’s flat. He invited me to lunch so we could talk about the flat and I agreed. As we ate, his frog eyes ran me up and down, they flickered with excitement as they rested on my ample boobs, a bit of saliva caught between his puffy lips. I knew instantly what he wanted.
“I was disgusted. I felt my insides turned. Did he think I would stoop so low as to sleep with him because I wanted his silly flat? ‘The place will be ready soon,’ he said as we left the restaurant. ‘Here’s my card. Give me a call, I’ll see what I can do to help you … ‘ And as the days went past, the flat was in my head—the cute bedroom, small but nice parlour and
its self-contained conveniences. I found myself toying with the idea of calling the landlord and instantly made up my mind the day Ann and her husband spelt it out. I had till the end of the month to leave. I couldn’t blame them really—three months had spread into nine. I found myself calling the landlord and agreeing to meet him.
“As repulsive as I found him, somehow I found myself putting on a tight skirt and leaving the top few buttons of my blouse undone. When I got to his office, I was shocked at what I saw. As the secretary ushered me in with a knowing look, there was this imposing couch in his expansive office. How many ‘businesses’ had he executed here?
‘So glad you could make it,’ he said, drooling at my figure. As he clasped my hand in a hand shake, he managed to brush my boobs. Did I want anything to eat? I said no, just to discuss the lease of the flat. He opened one of the drawers on his desk and gave me the lease—all payments made.
“lt was now up to me. He obviously wanted me so badly. Surely sleeping with him now and then would be worth it? The creep I had lived with for two years had no qualms about throwing me over for another woman. Why can’t I benefit from this cut and dried business proposal? I thanked him, accepted his offer to help myself to a drink from the Fridge in his
“I opened the fridge then, deliberately bent down with my back to him. My skirt rode up and I felt him rush over to where I was, his grubby hands caressing my bum. Quickly, he turned me around to face him, kissing me hard on the lips. ‘Think about the flat, ‘I kept on telling myself as he lowered me to the couch. ‘You’re gorgeous,’ he panted after making sure the door was firmly locked.
Then he quickly undressed and made a grab for my knickers! “It was a relief the sex was mercifully quick. He looked so pleased with himself afterwards. ‘You’re a very lucky girl,’ he said later ‘so many people wanted the flat as a sort of guest house.’ Lucky? Maybe, especially when I got to Ann’s and discovered she still had that hostile look she gave me any time I came in. I showed her the lease to the flat and her attitude changed. I apologised for overstaying and when I moved she actually gave me some stuff to take with me.
“The flat is taking shape and guess who paid for the bed? He’s so obvious it is disgusting. But he never forces himself on me. He’s a busy man, comes maybe once in two weeks for his quickie. It would have been a nightmare if he were one of these men who go on and on. And the flat is lovely, especially now I’ve done it up a bit… I’ll soon ask you and Ann to visit. I’m not proud of how I got the flat, mind you, but I keep telling myself that all lovely things come at a place…”